It’s not often that I post about my experiences as an educator, but within this field my passion was ALWAYS teachers. Supporting teachers, mentoring teachers, and relating to teachers was my motivation. It was truly because teachers are what impacts our students the most. So, all that to say, here is my soap box when it comes to relationships within a school. The concept is really no different if you apply it to any business or leadership role. It all boils down to people.
Education is an ever evolving door and after 15 years I have seen a lot. My most favorite aspect of all my roles within this field was holding leadership positions that allowed me to impact and support teachers. From the classroom to the Vice Principal’s chair, I bring a unique perspective to the table. Let me walk you through two roles that can make or break the culture of a school.
The relationship between a school leader and a teacher is priceless. After 8 years as a teacher, and 7 years as a school administrator, I’ve experienced multiple connections both good and bad within these relationships. Some took a lot of work and some seemed to happen overnight. But, one thing is certain. All the relationships were worthy of respect and time.
For both a principal and a teacher, it is important to recognize and appreciate the other person’s role. Judgement or acceptance can easily come from both sides. Either side can take on a negative outlook when they forget to be quick to listen, ask questions, and take on a new perspective. Without this understanding, communication and collegial relationships will not exist.
Principals enter the world of leadership with zeal and passion. Seeing the organization of a school through rose colored glasses while wearing a super hero shirt. This makes the job seem big, yet each task small. But then, the truth sets in.
The truth is not necessarily that the super hero shirt doesn’t fit…because it does. But it’s the relentless “to do” list that is out of one’s control. This list can rob an educational leader of their thunder and leadership style that brought them to the role in the first place.
As the leader of a building, everything falls on your shoulders. The happiness of everyone (literally) is your responsibility. Although a good leader understands that not everyone will be happy, the point is to make tough decisions, yet prioritize people. But it’s not quite that easy.
So what is the “side” of a leader’s story? Well, it’s the feeling of having limited support to help navigate the unseen side of leadership, parent requests, student needs, and stakeholders misunderstandings. This also applies to the struggle to maintain academic success while also meeting the social-emotional needs of students. The principal is suppose to lead all of these initiatives at the same time. But in it all, we can’t forget who stands on the frontline…
It’s like a marriage. Usually a spouse is neglected when kids come along. Same goes for a principal-teacher relationship. When other duties call, it’s usually the teacher that is neglected and put at the bottom of the list. Not because of unimportance, but because other things are demanding of attention and time runs out.
It is then that the teacher’s voice is often silenced. Silence creates a fear of leaders. So when the leader does enter a room, whether it be to share a need or conduct an observation, a teacher sits on edge of approval or rejection. When a teacher later has a need, what is left is a fear of approaching a leader for help.
When the inconsistent development of professional relationships and personal relationships are out of balance, disconnection occurs. After the silence and fear, negativity follows. With negativity comes gossip. And with gossip, comes the decay of moral.
So far this seems like a sad story. Yes, the scenario I’ve painted is, but the good news is that this can be fixed. No two buildings are the same, just like no two classrooms are the same. However, within every building there is one consistent priority. Relationships. They will stretch you thin and wear you out, but when this priority is out of place, everything else suffers. When the relationship of trust is broken or even worse, never established, presence or no presence doesn’t seem to matter anymore.
So what’s the answer for the leader? Build those relationships. Whenever you can be visibly present, do it. Walk the halls, enter classrooms, greet students and staff at lunch, participate in dismissal, be visible to parents. Smile, wave, say “hi”, shake hands, ask questions. All these actions say, “I’m here and I want to be.” Sometimes a fact and sometimes…well…you’ve got to fake it to make it. Just be present because these interactions establish the culture of the school.
So what’s the answer for the teacher? Build those relationships. It looks different for the teacher than the leader, but in only a few small ways. Your responsibility is to build relationships with colleagues, students, and parents. When these relationships are established sometimes the job of being the teacher to a difficult student becomes easier. Having professional as well as personal relationships with colleagues, brings “fun” to the work place. Establishing a positive relationship with students and parents in the beginning brings respect as well as confidence. Overall, work your way into positive relationships with everyone.
There will never be a perfect school, a perfect administrator, a perfect teacher, or a perfect student. But that is what makes us all unique and responsible to everyone. It is each persons responsibility, regardless of their title, to prioritize people and relationships. When this occurs, overtime, the culture of a building will be one of happiness and trust. And both sides of an educators’ story will meet in the middle to achieve what is best for students…success for the WHOLE CHILD.
